What the fuck is happening…

I Swear (ya like that?) that TWD is trying to fuck itself over. The past few shows have been straight up NYC garabage. 100% garbage and a fucking half. And I’m not sure how familiar you folks are with the smell of NYC garbage, but it is vastly different. VASTLY. And this one almost took the cake for worst episode of the previous three. There was one saving grace that saved this absolute trainwreck but regardless, this is just getting embarrassing. Every time I see commercials saying TWD is the number 1 show, I have to question what the fuck that even means? It can’t be the number 1 watched show, that’s a fucking joke. At this rate, I’m sure it’s driving viewers away.

Regardless, we did get one exciting piece of information: Oceanside. Now, I’ve finally caught up to the show in my comics reading. As a matter of fact, I’ve slightly passed it and kinda see what might be going down with Carl and Jesus. Obviously some roles have slightly changed with some characters being replaced by others, but for the most part, everything is generally on the same track. That being said, Oceanside, so far, is completely void of the comics. And I love it.

This may be one of the more interesting places in the show at this point, as a colony who has felt the complete and utter wrath of Negan and the Saviors, and has actually escaped. At first, I’ll be honest, I rolled my eyes. Of course Tara is gonna run into an all female colony, her absolute apocalyptic heaven. And then I realized that she had no idea about her lesbian lover getting a bolt through the eye, that’s gonna be a rough conversation. So along we go, assuming that we’ve just stumbled upon a group of women who’ve turned into Amazonians. Again, a lesbo paradise.

Welcome to Oceanside

However, we get a much deeper look, and I guess you kinda had to see it coming, that the Saviors have a much wider grasp on the surrounding area. What a fucking power move slaughtering all the men and boys. That’s some Mad Max style shit. Just absolutely embracing the apocalypse, I love it. And although we see Tara safely make it back to Alexandria, it was great to see TWD not fall into one of their classic tropes. I was fully expecting that this community, who was hostile at first, would turn into some kinda loving family who embraced Tara and Alexandria with open arms. Lo-and-behold we get a group of fuckin crazy chicks hellbent on keeping their sanctuary a secret and we’re willing to kill anybody who stumbled upon them.

You have to assume that they join the fray. We’re starting to see factions that can help out in their own individual ways, not just strength in numbers. Oceanside has experienced the full extent of Negan’s goons and would have more than enough cause for revenge, albeit a delayed one. The Hilltop, while they’re a bunch of pussies, have the numbers and a distinct geographical advantage, and a dickton of food. The Kingdom has a leader loved by everyone and a fucking tiger, as well as the numbers. And obviously we have Alexandria, fearless and hellbent on avenging Glenn and Abraham.

Now with our portly doctor being axed last season, Tara has no lover. Enter Cindy, nice Amazonian woman who saved Tara three times from her crazy colony of seaside witches. I gotta assume, very similar to Gregory and the Hilltop’s situation, that Natania, leader of Oceanside, will be ousted. I can’t see someone as set in their ways and such a terrible leader running these colonies for so long. The three leaders who have stuck around the longest are Rick, Negan, and Ezekiel. All three are either respected, feared, or loved by their followers. Expect to see Cindy take over Natania’s role.

Some tidbits for the road

I’m not sure if this was a knock against Heath, but that woman rasta-zombie looked exactly like Heath. And come to think of it, he looks like a very sexually ambiguous person. Like a real David Bowie, Eddie Redmayne person, only black. With dreds. Either way, hopefully we haven’t seen the last of Heath. He was starting to grow on me a bit but I can’t help but think we’re gonna see him get captured by the Saviors. Pray for our boy.

Not telling Rosita about Oceanside, good or bad move? I gotta assume at this point, a pretty solid move. Best to layoff after almost being killed multiple times, so it’s pretty safe to say that they may not want you sniffing around again. Especially with Rosita so hot on rushing into to take out Negan. Gotta play this one safe and for the long haul.

The sexy sax music? What the fuck was that? George Michael/Kenny G does not belong in TWD, as much as I’d love it to. Very strangely placed, in a fuckin stupid scene. Not a fan. But kinda a fan.

TDR’s 5 Vegas Picks

Daryl dies in the Season Finale:70/30

Rick gets his hand cut off at the Midseason Finale:50/50

Oceanside joins the party:70/30

Heath was captured by the Saviors:40/60

Tara and Cindy start boning:90/10

Rating

Grape Toaster Strudels

(7.2)

Thanks again for reading. Feel free to leave a comment, like the blog, leave some feedback, or maybe even follow. See you next time kiddys.

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